10 Things You Should Know About the Minds Behind Review City, USA

1. Chairman Mel is extremely jealous of Phil's ability to be Asian.

2. Phil is extremely jealous of Mel's ability to -----------------------.

3. At least 75% of Review City USA's contributers have tried to nail, have considered nailing, or have been nailed by Tara.

4. In 2007 Jake took Tara on a date to see then red-hot indie rock band Tapes n' Tapes. Of the date Jake said, "I don't know who's more overrated, Tara or the band!" Nevertheless, they remain great friends!

4. Baercat appreciates a good sauce. Whenever he dines at Del Taco he orders extra white sauce on all his items and even asks for extra on the side. It is rumored that he spikes his Cherry Coke with the white sauce, thereby making the most delicious soda/white sauce mixture known to man. 

5. Jake Smart's first name is Richard. It'd be really funny if you started calling him Dick.

6. During No Wild Thing Weekend i was supposed to sleep in Wild Thing's bed. But Trent Mano and our very own Nate Housley were cuddling with my ex-girlfriend in said bed so I had to sleep in the band room.

7. Ferociousnate Barnes was once the lead singer of a band in Provo called The Otters. Because of his frontman status he bagged a bunch of chicks. When Baercat started his new band, The Protons, in Salt Lake City he demoted Nate to bassist and assumed the lead vocals role himself as a way to protect his dear friend and roommate from the markedly sluttier women of Salt Lake.

8. Jake and Joel Baercat once started an "Suck my D!*k" chant during a DMX song at a dance party in Provo. This infuriated Tara's ex-boyfriend Bardhi and that guy who has never been seen not dancing. 

9. Sean and Jake recently spent an hour or so listing all the girls they had made out with. Jake wrote small and fit all his on one Post-It note. Sean wrote big and had to use several. It was agreed that they were both equally pathetic.

10. One day Chairmen Mel met his boss. That night-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------.

11. BONUS FACT. Chairmen Mel is closer to being a lesbian than anyone I have ever met, excepting my lesbian aunt and her lover. He wears sandals and Ezekiel shorts throughout winter. He loves girls. He blow dries his hair. Also, he's joining the Peace Corps and plans on buying a red Miata upon his return.